Engagement shoot: to market, to market

Andrew and I had our engagement photos taken around Capitol Hill this past Saturday (finally, yay!), and I can honestly say the whole experience was even more fun and laid-back than I expected it to be! We staged plenty of poses around the Dome and Senate-side grotto before heading to Eastern Market for some more informal photos against a backdrop of brick walls and produce stands. To our delight, the weather held up and despite the wind making its presence known on occasion by messing with my hair in the midst of a shot, it couldn't have been a prettier day.

My mother's sister, Daria, was visiting with us for the weekend and we dragged her along for the ride -- but she captured some great behind-the-scenes moments from the shoot and was able to wander off on her own at Eastern Market to peruse the antiques and jewelry vendors. Even our photographer, Lisa Boggs, came back with acquisitions of her own: a gorgeous amber ring and an adorable, floppy sun hat :)


Lisa tells me that she should have some of the shots up on her blog by Thursday, and I can't wait to see how everything turned out! A BIG THANK YOU to Lisa for her patience with us novice models and for her awesome ideas on composition, and also many many thanks to my makeup artist, Gina Robinson, for making me look so pretty! 

{Andrew and I ham it up between takes; courtesy of my aunt Daria}

I DO NOT: When engagement rings are no longer engagement rings

Yesterday afternoon, I opened up an email forwarded by a writer friend that often sends me wedding-related links and stories that she thinks I might find interesting. Except this one came with the caveat that I would have to write a blog post after reading it. I was intrigued. 

The original message was from one Olga Topchaya, Director of Marketing for Leon Megé Inc, which bills itself as a "luxury jewelry company." Olga touted the launch of an "unprecedented product" in engagement ring fashion based on the philosophy that "fashion is not merely a style; it's a state of mind." Go on.

"An engagement ring is not merely for the engaged." 


Wait . . . 


Huh?


"The rings will transform and expand the meaning and purpose of an engagement ring," wrote Olga.

At first I thought it was a bad joke. Believe me, it is not.

For every non-occasion in your dating or single life, there's a ring for that:


Le Petite Indépendance: enables a single woman to own an engagement ring

Le Petite Amour: a token of affection

Le Petite Liberté: a symbol of freedom from society’s standards for love necessitating Marriage – proposal for cohabitation

Le Petite Promesse: an oath that an engagement will occur at some point in the future

Le Petite Allusion: a woman wears to drop a hint to her significant other her taste in an engagement ring before he makes a mistake

The list goes on.

Like a bad flashback to the scene in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days where pitch-man Matthew McConaughey comes up with the cringe-worthy slogan "Ladies: Frost Yourselves" as a ploy to get women to buy their own diamonds instead of receiving them as gifts from gentleman romancers, Leon Megé's utterly transparent scheme to boost sales under the pretense of feminism is seriously the worst case of life imitating art.

From the press release accompanying the email: "Megé asserts that our society has dictated that a diamond ring has to be a symbol of engagement. 'Especially in today’s world, where marriage rates are declining and divorce rates are increasing, it seems hardly fair that such luxury should be reserved for the bride,' states Megé."

While I appreciate Mr. Megé's indisputably sincere and heartfelt concern for all the unwedded women of the world and for our nation's rising divorce rate, aside from being just a ridiculously stupid idea altogether, this marketing blunder accomplishes nothing more than the cheapening of what engagement signifies and what marriage means. Let me wax philosophical for just a moment.

I dated my fiancé for 8 years before we got engaged. By giving me that ring and asking me to marry him, he meant that just being together wasn't enough. That we were going to be together always. That he cared enough about me to put up with my moody sniping and griping, my spontaneous late-night cheese fry cravings, my large and occasionally overbearing family, my flighty memory, the slow incursion of my stuff into every available space in the apartment including in his own tiny closet, and all the other good and bad and annoying stuff that comes with me. That not only did he love me and did I know he loved me, but that he wanted to declare that love before friends, family, and God.

Even if the Western World's symbol of engagement had instead evolved over time to the wearing of a necklace or a pin or a tattoo or a piece of twine instead of a diamond ring, the ultimate value is not in its market worth but in its meaning. By equalizing everybody so as not to leave out anybody, it becomes special to nobody.

Behind the Lens: Lisa Boggs

After many emails, phone calls, and meetings with potential candidates, in January Andrew and I unanimously decided on a photographer for our wedding. The skilled shutterbug who will be documenting our big day from start to finish is a Tennessee transplant to DC, Lisa Boggs, who runs her own photography operation out of Great Falls, VA.

As I previously mentioned, I found Lisa through a local wedding blog that has gradually become less of an indulgence and more of an obsession, United With Love. Pretty much everything featured on that site is amazing, so I figured she would be nothing short of amazing herself. And I was right.

Before Andrew and I even met Lisa in person, she and I spent over an hour on the phone chatting about ourselves, our relationships (Lisa's already been married for a few years), our families, and growing up with food allergies -- it's nice to be able to commiserate once in a while. Lisa is energetic, super sweet, and quirky in the BEST of ways and is just so much fun to talk to. And not to brag, but she's won WeddingWire's Bride's Choice Awards two years in a row. She has a very creative eye and loves colorful exciting weddings, so I'm sure my pastel color explosion will keep her camera occupied.

We had originally scheduled our engagement shoot to take place on Saturday of last weekend, but it being April and it also being DC (where you have a better chance of predicting the weather correctly by flipping a coin than our local weathermen), our plans were foiled first by massive thunderstorms and then by gusting winds when we tried to push back to Sunday.

So we've rainchecked for Saturday, April 30, and I hope to finally have some photos of Andrew and me looking like a happy engaged couple to post on here within the next two weeks. In the meantime, check out Lisa's blog to get an idea of her artistic sense and what our shoot might turn out like!

Cake cannibalism?

My friend Christine drew my attention to this creepy news blurb. Does that count as cannibalism?

Going fruity

A number of people have asked about my general ideas for my wedding color palette, so here are some images that might paint a clearer picture of what I'm going for. I'm looking at watermelon and canteloupe/peach as my primaries, with light lemon and lime accents.

Think: 1920s garden party, early summer florals, gentle breeze and cold pitchers of sweet cocktails and fruit drinks...

{all above via elizabeth anne designs}

I DO: BHLDN, a romantic and affordable wedding line

I have always loved Anthropologie. Not just because I was a cultural anthropology major in college and have an affinity for the name, or because their clothes and home decor are too cute for words, or because the PA-headquartered company's first store -- located on the Main Line in Wayne, PA -- was only a short drive from my parents' house when my interest in fashion began to bud.

I've loved Anthropologie because they "get it." They get me. They know that girls like me don't want to dress like vixens or runway models all the time -- they want to feel comfortable and cozy in the clothes they're wearing or in the sheets they're sleeping under. They know we want quality clothes that will last, and that we're willing to pay a little extra for them. They know we value attention to details, like hand-beading, dyeing, ornamental buttons or mood-lifting patterns.

So today's news that Anthropologie will be rolling out a wedding line, BHLDN (pronounced "beholden") next month is simply warming the cockles of my heart. As my friend McLean explains on her fashion and life blog, the line will feature original designs from the brand as well as pieces by Fleur Wood, Tracy Reese, and Catherine Deane created exclusively for Anthropologie. Dresses will run from moderately priced ($1000) to moderately expensive ($4000). 

If the styles, fits, and detailing of these dresses and accessories are any reflection of Anthropologie as we know it I'm sure brides everywhere will be queuing up for the launch -- fittingly, on the most romantic day of the year: Valentine's Day.

The Martha Stewart debut

Had a great long weekend up in New York, and got to spend some quality time with a bunch of my close friends -- including my MOH and a couple of the bridesmaids.

I rendezvous-ed with Marisa at Penn Station an hour before the show and limped to the studio on my gimp foot (I forgot to mention in previous posts that I fell off a pair of 5 inch heels 45 minutes into the New Year, and seriously mangled my right ankle). After what seemed to be ages waiting in line in the blustery cold, we were ushered in to the studio to be prepped, to primp, and to submit our questions and release forms prior to taping.

The aforementioned gimp food proved fortuitous in the end, as it ushered me and Marisa to the front of the line and the front row of the studio audience.

The taping took almost two hours and it was a fun experience, but although we came back with some nice things (like an espresso machine, a swank pair of Hanky Panky's, and some Oscar de la Renta perfume) there weren't as many bridal takeaways as I had hoped. I think the most useful thing I went home with was the winter issue of Martha Stewart Weddings magazine.

Check out the preview for our TV audience debut here, where Marisa's bright orange shirt makes an appearance: http://www.marthastewart.com/show/the-martha-stewart-show/winter-weddings-show

The show airs today (Thursday) at 10am on the Hallmark Channel.

I DO: In love with United With Love

Hands down, United With Love is my favorite new wedding blog obsession.

Recently started by Nole Garey and Juli Smith, who were once DC brides themselves, United With Love features real Washington weddings and offers a plethora of creative DIY decorating ideas, playful themes, and unusual color palettes that so closely mirror my own taste. (Let's be honest, pretty much everything I'm going to do at my reception will probably have been stolen from a post I saw on UWL). It's hard not to find inspiration in a post, and I'm always clicking the refresh button to see if something new has been added.

And, without wasting an entire day at the office perusing the blog last month, I would never have found my photographer, Lisa, in the sea of DC vendors!

Washingtonian: Unveiled

Washingtonian Magazine is hosting its annual wedding showcase on January 23rd.

Aside from working the check-in desk at a bridal expo for extra cash in college, I've never attended one of these things and am yet to be sold on their merits. I tend to suffer from information overload (a la those annoying Bing commercials all over TV), and I feel like I would be over-inundated with different ideas and suggestions for vendors for every service I need to book all at once. I much prefer to do one thing at a time -- nail down a venue, find a priest, then get a photographer, a caterer, a florist, and so on and so forth down the line. Everything at once would just overwhelm me. Not to mention, $55 is a steep price to have advertisements thrown at you all day.

So I've entered to win tickets for free, and if I happen to get picked then I'll probably go. Otherwise, I'll just keep to my system and get any vendor info I need online from peer reviews on sites like Wedding Wire, Martha Stewart Weddings and The Knot, and from an occasional purchase of Washingtonian's Bride & Groom magazine. 

Back from radio silence...

Once again, I've failed to update the blog regularly. For shame! Especially since December was such a busy month with a lot of goings-on that were definitely worth posting on here. So I'll try to get through a few updates as succinctly and as interestingly as I can.

Firstly, my friends' good juju with the Martha Stewart Show has rubbed off on me, and yours-truly will be in the all-bride audience next week for a very special weddings episode! At the encouragement of my Martha-in-training friend McLean, I submitted a very hastily-assembled pitch through the show's website as to why I deserved an invitation. Apparently, Martha's screeners bought it. So on Thursday, January 13th, I'll be heading up to New York City for an advance taping that will air at a later date (usually the show is live). And, I'm excited to say, I get to bring a fellow bride as a guest -- so that means my dear college friend Marisa (who ties the knot with fiance Aric this May) will be in tow. We've both been instructed to wear BRIGHT COLORS and be prepared to tell our engagement and wedding planning stories, so I'm hoping that means we'll get some one-on-one opportunities with Martha and possibly have the opportunity to win some prizes! At the very least, I expect to come home with some sweet audience swag. McLean and another friend, Kristina, told me they came back with amazing gifts from their audience experiences.

Secondly, we have booked an amazingly talented photographer, Lisa Boggs! :::The crowd roars!::: This development warrants its own post, so more on that later.







Thirdly, we have reserved a date at St. Mary Catholic Church in Old Town Alexandria for our ceremony, and will be importing our own Ukrainian Catholic priest! Both DC-area Ukrainian churches are far away from where we live, our venue site, and our preferred hotels for guests and are additionally not in areas that are easily accessible by metro or other public transportation, so exchanging vows at either location would've caused a lot of problems for everyone. It took some wheeling and dealing to convince parties on both ends, but it looks like we'll be able to pull this all off... and with only a little extra donation in our church coffer each Sunday.

Lastly, there are a ton of wedding showcases, expos, sales, and so-on ahead on the calendar to kick off the new year, and I will try my best to hit as many of them as I can!

The hottest honeymoons, according to Jetsetter

Stumbled upon this post on Jetsetter's blog from back in October about the 5 hottest honeymoons for 2011.

Listed among the locations are French Polynesia -- essentially my dream escape of secluded, luxury, thatched-roof suites on pillars above crystal clear waters -- and an African safari, which I have yet unsuccessfully convinced my fiancé Andrew is a great idea (as he succinctly puts it, "Things die in Africa").

Hopefully these two regions don't blow up among the touristy set and become overrun by 2012, although safaris are already quickly becoming the new "alternative"/"adventure" vacation, a title that Costa Rica and Belize once occupied before becoming more mainstream. I want my seclusion!

Ali and Chris's wedding featured in Martha Stewart Real Weddings!

My super-sweet friend Ali married her college sweetheart Chris back in April, and I've been going to Ali for wedding ideas and vendor suggestions since then. She's really been an inspiration to me in my own planning, and I have to say that her style and attention to detail resulted in one of (if not the) cutest, most creatively designed weddings I've ever seen.

Apparently, Martha Stewart thinks so as well!

Ali and Chris's wedding has been highlighted in the Martha Stewart Weddings website's "Real Weddings" feature. Congrats to both of you for being so Martha Stewart-fabulous! :)

Check out the inspired color schemes, decorations, and photography -- courtesy of exceptional photographer Kate Headley -- right here!

A happy husband is a cleanly husband

"The secret to a happy marriage is to roll up your sleeves and help your wife with the housework."

Andrew, I hope you're reading this.

After the honeymoon...

My friend Lauren, a recent bride, shared this article on marriage with me and another engaged friend this morning. It's titled "10 Shocking Secrets About the First Year of Marriage." In my opinion, this is largely a misnomer as I am not so much "shocked" as I am gently reminded of some of the less glamorous aspects of living together as a couple. It may be because Andrew and I have been cohabiting for a little over 5 years now or because we've dated for the better part of a decade, but we hit these bumps in the road as they came up with little or no shock to our single systems.

Andrew and I split chores. I am not, nor do I ever expect to be, Iron Chef of the household -- I can bake a cake in my sleep while Andrew can make a gourmet dish out of anything (including ramen noodles), and we're cool with that. We've always been "broke" since we moved in together and had to split rent, food, and entertainment costs so we don't expect our situation to improve at all after a $45,000 wedding. And the love weight? Let's hope the sack of potatoes I seem to have picked up around my hips and belly from lots of couch time with my fiance is all preemptive and won't come back after my wedding diet.

The one thing that does not shock me but worries me to no end is that seemingly close friends will start to drop off. I already experienced it to a degree when I first entered a relationship with Andrew and we were in that nauseating new-love period where you want to spend every waking moment together and prefer staying in bed cuddly-wuddling all day to going to parties and slamming shots at the bar with your friends. In that instance, the distancing by friends was warranted. Luckily, we both recovered our normal habits quickly and the casualties were minimal. But what will happen when we're no longer dating and are officially Mr and Mrs and become a package deal?

Most of my friends are single or casually dating and aren't even thinking about marriage, and we have very few couples to hang out with in this city of perennial singletons. Even so, Andrew and I have successfully navigated the pro-bachelor landscape as a couple thus far, endearingly referred to as "Mom and Dad" by some of our nearest and dearest friends. I hope that in marriage, my friends will still see that I'm still "me", just with a lot more bling on my finger and a last name that's much easier to pronounce!

If it's free, I'll take it

Part of the joy of planning a wedding for such a large family and circle of friends is that the cost of food and drink for guests really eats away at the budget. Each time I think I've got my guest list cemented, I'm reminded of another aunt and uncle that I forgot out in Anywhere, USA... and their 4 children. And then the budget shifts a little bit. I can't forget that close family friend that grew up with my mom but I haven't seen since I was in middle school. And it shifts a little more.

There have been a lot of bridal contests popping up on the web lately, and believe me -- I've entered them all. Some are for photography packages, others for honeymoons or bridal gowns. I've submitted my info for each and every one of them almost instantly after finding them.

Bella Pictures, one of the largest wedding photography services, is offering a $4800 package to the lucky winner in their prize drawing. Down side is you also receive a slew of unwanted phone calls and emails from Bella within 24 hours of registering that is bordering on harassment. I guess it's the economy stupid?

My favorite luxury clothing and travel one-stop-shopping emporium, Gilt Group, is running a contest for an all-inclusive equally-luxurious honeymoon worth $5000. Applicants must plead their case to Gilt as to why they need or deserve their honeymoon to be paid for, and Gilt's anonymous panel of judges will decide. Although I doubt I have a sob story good enough to stand out, there's really no down side to this one -- everything about Gilt is simply golden.

TheKnot is encouraging engaged couples to share their stories of betrothal to subscribers on their site for a chance to win a five-night stay at any all-inclusive Dreams resort in the world. Not too shabby. And while the winners for the previous two contests are selected largely at random, TheKnot entries will be based on votes and reader comments.

This mean's I'll be encouraging everyone I know to VOTE FOR ALEXIS AND ANDREW ASAP!!!

Daily Candy hearts weddings

I'm pretty happy to see a plethora of wedding information coming out of Daily Candy lately -- two emails in the past week alone! Their wedding section has been awfully quiet since August, so it's nice to see more posts from them, especially since Daily Candy usually has a more indie vibe to its features that other wedding sites don't often suggest.

Please keep 'em coming, Candy!

The ledger has landed

Fresh off a relaxing weekend in Miami with some of my favorite ladies, I am happy to report that Oxon Hill Manor has FINALLY received their 2012 ledger and we are now penciled in for Friday, May 18, 2012 (we'll be "penned" in once they cash our security deposit and file our completed rental form).

There were a few hems and haws from doubters out there who teased us for picking a date so far in advance. You still don't believe me that things book up unbelievably fast around here? Well, another bride came in to Oxon Hill Manor's events office early this morning and booked May 19, 2012 -- the day after the date we were holding out for. Another Saturday in that month is also already off the table for a wedding. And the crazy thing is that the 2012 ledger arrived just this morning. 

I believe I've made my point. Moving along.

I'm relieved and happy to get started with the nitty and the gritty of planning. Now that I have an actual date to tell vendors, I can actually start meeting with them to discuss products and services and sign some contracts. The wedding ball is officially rolling!

Alfred Angelo: the new fairy godmother

If you've always dreaming of a fairy tale wedding, there's some exciting news...

For those brides who really want the look and feel of a Disney damsel as they walk down the aisle, designer Alfred Angelo has teamed up with the House of Mouse to roll out a collection of princess-inspired wedding gowns.

The dresses borrow style sense from some of Disney's most-loved animated fashionistas, including Belle, Aurora, Jasmine, and Cinderella.

Better yet, you don't need a royal dowry to afford a piece from the new collection. With each dress costing less than $1200, you can look like a princess without paying like one.

Perez Hilton's fashion site, Coco Perez, has a sneak peak video of the collection, which will be available for retail in 2011.

Not necessarily my style (I've been pretty open about my adoration for the classic sleek-and-sexy mermaid cut), but for brides who want to take the 'mermaid' look literally, there's now an Ariel gown for that.

Where the heart is

When we first announced our engagement, almost everyone asked where my wedding would be: DC or Philly? One, the place I now lived; the other, the place I had always called home. 

Although I knew I wanted to have the ceremony here in the epicenter of the political world I've grown to love, the choice had already been made for me. Weeks before the proposal, my father told me he was selling his house -- our house, where he had married my mother, where I had been born, where we had loved and lost and overcome all life had to throw at us, and where I had always imagined the roots of our family would stay firmly grounded. 

Throughout my life, I've considered my parents' house a center of gravity. No matter where I spun out -- be it off to school in Boston, summer adventures somewhere far and away, or forging my career path in a new city -- I'd always find myself drawn back home.

Early on, my parents instilled in me the notion that our house was a place of gathering, of comfort, and of love. It was constantly filled with people, both friends and family, who would come for my dad's corny puns and my mom's gentle sarcasm and stay for the good food, the stories, and the sense of warmth and inclusion that emanated from our happy home. When my mother passed away in 2002, we tried our best to keep things the same and leave our door open to everyone at any time the way she would've wanted it to be. For the past eight years, we maintained the house and its gardens as a monument to all that she was and all who she loved, and it is difficult to this day to find a single object there that did not feel the touch of her hand.

But to my father, that same house is no longer just a monument. Instead, he says, it has become a tomb. Standing quiet and empty while he is in Florida running his business most of the year, it stores mementos of the wife he lost and the daughter that grew up and moved away. His side of the family left town long ago, heading northwest to Chicago; south to Virginia and North Carolina; east across the Atlantic to the United Kingdom. Some of my mother's side is still in the area, but many of them have also scattered to the wind across land and sea.

Planning a wedding and a whole new life as a married couple is tough enough as it is. Doing so without the comfort of 'home' to run back to when I'll need it is unimaginably tougher. 

It's coming sooner than expected, but the reality of it is that I'm going to have to create my own home; my own safe place; my own new center of gravity. And I hope it will be just as warm and as comforting as what my parents built... and more.

Paging Johnny Depp?

Found this story today about a couple who stumbled upon none other than The Boss himself while posing for engagement photos on the beach in Manasquan. How cool of a photo shoot that must've been! From the article: 

The Grammy and Oscar-winning musician did a quick tune up of Dwyer's strings and then riffed on the couple's coming nuptials, as the couple smiled and listened...