The ledger has landed

Fresh off a relaxing weekend in Miami with some of my favorite ladies, I am happy to report that Oxon Hill Manor has FINALLY received their 2012 ledger and we are now penciled in for Friday, May 18, 2012 (we'll be "penned" in once they cash our security deposit and file our completed rental form).

There were a few hems and haws from doubters out there who teased us for picking a date so far in advance. You still don't believe me that things book up unbelievably fast around here? Well, another bride came in to Oxon Hill Manor's events office early this morning and booked May 19, 2012 -- the day after the date we were holding out for. Another Saturday in that month is also already off the table for a wedding. And the crazy thing is that the 2012 ledger arrived just this morning. 

I believe I've made my point. Moving along.

I'm relieved and happy to get started with the nitty and the gritty of planning. Now that I have an actual date to tell vendors, I can actually start meeting with them to discuss products and services and sign some contracts. The wedding ball is officially rolling!

Where the heart is

When we first announced our engagement, almost everyone asked where my wedding would be: DC or Philly? One, the place I now lived; the other, the place I had always called home. 

Although I knew I wanted to have the ceremony here in the epicenter of the political world I've grown to love, the choice had already been made for me. Weeks before the proposal, my father told me he was selling his house -- our house, where he had married my mother, where I had been born, where we had loved and lost and overcome all life had to throw at us, and where I had always imagined the roots of our family would stay firmly grounded. 

Throughout my life, I've considered my parents' house a center of gravity. No matter where I spun out -- be it off to school in Boston, summer adventures somewhere far and away, or forging my career path in a new city -- I'd always find myself drawn back home.

Early on, my parents instilled in me the notion that our house was a place of gathering, of comfort, and of love. It was constantly filled with people, both friends and family, who would come for my dad's corny puns and my mom's gentle sarcasm and stay for the good food, the stories, and the sense of warmth and inclusion that emanated from our happy home. When my mother passed away in 2002, we tried our best to keep things the same and leave our door open to everyone at any time the way she would've wanted it to be. For the past eight years, we maintained the house and its gardens as a monument to all that she was and all who she loved, and it is difficult to this day to find a single object there that did not feel the touch of her hand.

But to my father, that same house is no longer just a monument. Instead, he says, it has become a tomb. Standing quiet and empty while he is in Florida running his business most of the year, it stores mementos of the wife he lost and the daughter that grew up and moved away. His side of the family left town long ago, heading northwest to Chicago; south to Virginia and North Carolina; east across the Atlantic to the United Kingdom. Some of my mother's side is still in the area, but many of them have also scattered to the wind across land and sea.

Planning a wedding and a whole new life as a married couple is tough enough as it is. Doing so without the comfort of 'home' to run back to when I'll need it is unimaginably tougher. 

It's coming sooner than expected, but the reality of it is that I'm going to have to create my own home; my own safe place; my own new center of gravity. And I hope it will be just as warm and as comforting as what my parents built... and more.

The perfect place

When I told my friend McLean -- a journalist and savvy blogger -- that I had started a wedding blog, she offered her encouragement and her advice. Cardinal rule #1: post every day. And what have I done? I've left a 10 day gap since my last entry. Bad, bad bride.

And it's not for lack of material either. In fact, the past two weekends have been quite eventful with respect to finally nailing down that elusive wedding date and venue. Dozens of calls, site visits, and crumpled sheets of budgeting math later, I'm closing the book on my reception site. And at the risk of offending my fiancé, to whom I previously swore all of my heart, I can honestly declare that I am in love.

Oxon Hill Manor is a true DC gem hidden in plain sight, just 15 minutes south of the city in Oxon Hill, Maryland. It certainly slipped past my notice as I tore through metro area bridal magazines as it does not boldly advertise itself for rent like many other locales. Built in 1928 for Sumner Welles, President Franklin D. Roosevelt's Undersecretary of State, the 49-room mansion sits on a plot of land overlooking the Potomac that once belonged to George Washington's nephews. The manor is actually very easy to access as it is located right across the I-495 bridge from Old Town Alexandria. The area is better known for the monumental Washington National Harbor and luxury its hotels such as the Gaylord, so it's easy to see why Oxon Hill is overshadowed by its neighbors.

The manor has recently undergone significant renovations to its interior, and the pictures on its site are not current and therefore do not do it justice. But one of the most impressive features of the property is a spiraling antique wood and wrought-iron staircase from the second-floor bridal suite to the main hall, a spot I'm sure is commonly used by photographers for posing pictures.

Most amazing, however, are the perfectly manicured gardens of the estate. Seasonal flowers wrap around the property's large reflecting pool and line the way from the house to an old brick grotto -- a popular spot for on-site wedding ceremonies. 

The area around the reflecting pool is also a popular staging spot for wedding events, most commonly used for cocktail hour before a plated dinner. 

While the building itself holds up to 170 guests for a seated reception, the brick patio at the back of the manor serves as the stage for outdoor dinners for over 200 people, event tent optional. Some couples choose to hold their receptions al fresco in warmer weather, incorporating the open night sky as a part of their decor. 

Aside from meeting all of our personal criteria -- historic, metro-accessible from DC, and full of flowers -- the price was also right. For $4,400 (2010 pricing), a couple can reserve the entire property for a seven hour event block, 6pm-1am. Prince George MD county residents get a discounted rate, but alas we are both Arlingtonians so that doesn't apply for us. 

Oxon Hill Manor does come with some strict guidelines for when your vendors can arrive on-site for setup and breakdown. Additionally, there are some restrictions on dark foods and drinks that can be served at the reception as the caretakers are rightly concerned about property damage. But if you plan your event for a Friday, your vendors can arrive as early as you'd like for a nominal additional fee. Waivers for dark drinks such as red wine can also be obtained for a nominal additional fee to keep your guests from being baffled at the lack of pinot noir at the bar. 

And lastly, I cannot forget to mention the helpfulness of the Oxon Hill property administrators. They were kind, accommodating, and very informative! In my mind this is always a major selling point, as their behavior is a good indicator of what level of help you'd get from your venue staff should anything ever go wrong on the day of your wedding. We've gone to see several venues where one would assume the staff would be on their best behavior in the hope that you'd sign over a really fat check at the end of the tour, and were surprised by (most commonly) general indifference and once or twice even outright rudeness. More on other venues we've seen in a later post. 

So, we left all our information with the staff and will put our money down as soon as their 2012 ledger arrives (it is 'in the mail' and due to arrive this week, so the events office can't take any money from us until it has it in its possession). Once we cut the check, we'll get to work on some save-the-date cards...